2054
FRIDAY-
Yesterday I went to see Tennessee
at the hospital.
I stopped by Charlie’s room
first- he has been in for a few weeks- he’s doing ok- but was on a respirator
at first.
I didn’t know if I would find Tennessee’s’
room- I mean I only know him by this name- his street name.
On the way up the elevator- I
recognized a guy from the bluff ‘hey- do you know Tennessee’?
‘Yeah- he’s my brother- I’m going
to his room right now’.
Cool- I’ll follow.
Tennessee is the friend I have
been writing about- Dirk stabbed him last week.
Now- the first day I got the
news- I heard it from the street ‘yeah- he’s dead- his Aorta was cut..’
But- I knew some of these reports
were from street people- and I waited for a more reliable version.
Then the mission had someone call
the hospital- and they said he was alright- expected to make it.
As a matter of fact- Henry- my
buddy- said ‘Yeah- if his Aorta was cut- he would be dead’.
True.
I worked EMS for 25 years- I have
never heard of someone living with a wound like that.
So- as I head to the room- I go
in and Tennessee is surprised to see me.
Lots of his friends said they
would go- but many didn’t make it.
He’s lying here- on the bed- with
a scar that you get when you have open heart surgery.
Hmm?
He looks good [I’ll post the
pics] and he tells me that 2 major arteries to his heart were severed [his Aorta
was severed].
And he had a punctured lung.
All week doctors came to see him-
they never had a case- where someone in the field [not in a hospital setting
where you can do this during open heart surgery] had a severed Aorta- and
lived.
They said when he came in- his
heart was still pumping- a medical miracle.
Of course I prayed for him- and
my buddy who stabbed him- but this is really a miracle.
I prayed for him there in the
bed- his brother was there.
I told Tennessee ‘you have been
sober for a week now- why don’t you give it a shot- I’m 14 months sober- you can
do it’.
To be honest- I don’t think he
even thought of it.
His brother admitted something
while I spoke- he told Tennessee that he ‘messed up’.
Tennessee thought he meant he
went and drank- but his brother- without saying it- meant worse.
I told Tennessee ‘no- he means
the ‘other stuff’.
His brother was clean for 6
years- and used some stuff right after Tennessee was stabbed.
Pops- who was waiting downstairs
for me- he too relapsed after a relative was severely burned in the World Trade
Center attacks on 911.
So- this does happen.
Tennessee told me ‘Yeah- I know
Dirks out- on the street- I won’t press charges- I’m not a snitch’.
None of these guys trust the
cops- even if one of them is on his death bed.
I went and got Pop’s downstairs-
he was at the hospital visiting Charly- so I gave him a ride home- spent a
couple of hours with him.
I have been very busy- and I
needed to spend a little time on this side of town- where the halfway house and
all this other stuff is going on.
I took Pop’s back to his house-
he’s distraught over Charly- Pops has been a sort of surrogate father for
Charly for many years.
Charly is a severe alcoholic- and
Pop’s takes care of him.
Pop’s opened up- stuff I can’t
say- but he told me stuff about his past that he never told anyone.
I’m not Pop’s ‘pastor’ so to
speak- but I do pray for these guys- teach in my meetings- and they see me like
that.
It’s kinda funny- Pop’s has some
old friend Jimmy who just moved in from out of town.
Pop’s puts up guys in his spare
rooms every so often- the apt. is a wreck- and in the middle of a drug area.
Pop’s said ‘John- he won’t follow my rules- he
brings hookers home- he doesn’t like me playing my gospel songs’.
I told Pop’s if he won’t abide by
the rules- kick him out.
I asked pops’ about Jimmy- ‘is he
helping with the bills and stuff’.
He tells me ‘when he came back to
town- he was strapped out- had no cash’.
Kind of funny to hear the old man
talking the street lingo.
Pop’s has a good heart- really an
interesting guy.
As I left- prayed for him and
stuff- Pop’s says ‘thanks John- I love you’.
‘Yeah Pop’s- I love you too’.
NOTE- As I’m writing the post-
going back doing the spell check- I start laughing. Why? As I see the word
AORTA- I remember about 25 years ago at the fire dept.- my captain- George
Hubert- who died a few years ago. We were doing our EMT class- and after a
course on the heart- going thru the circulatory system- the instructor asks us
if we have any questions- you know- to see if we are grasping the material.
George asks ‘yeah- was does
A-O-R-T-A stand for’?
It was written on the board- he thought
it was some type of acronym/acrostic.
It was funny.
Either we had a bad instructor-
or George just wasn’t getting it.
It was strange- in my time with
Pop’s he brought up stuff that I have been writing about.
He talked- in anger- about ‘the
system’.
He told me 2 stories about police
abuse [he does not know I’m writing about this stuff].
A girl- friend of Charlie’s- was
raped by a guard years ago- while in prison.
And another girl- a minor- was
raped by a cop years ago [not sure where this took place- it has nothing to do
with the stuff I’m dealing with- these were stories from years ago].
But the girl was raped- did have
a son- Pops knows them.
And Pops was saying ‘that’s the
system John- the system is supposed to protect people- see- the antichrist
system is here –God’s going to judge it’.
I saw real anger in Pop’s- in a
way- he was tapping into what I have been dealing with- though he does not read
my site- or have access to a computer.
It was so strange to sort of see
the same ‘rage’ in my friend- over these issues- like a prophetic sign in a
way.
SATURDAY- got a call from Pop’s
yesterday- Charly [who has been in the ICU for a month] was up and eating and
doing well.
Pop’s was so happy.
One day I was walking in the area
of our halfway house- this was last year when I was walking 10-12 miles every
day.
I saw 2 ‘street girls’ heading my
way.
There are lots of hookers in that
area.
One was older [the mom?]- of
course they wanted to see if I was interested- I told them we have a halfway
house down the road- I am friends with Jackie [David’s girlfriend- who has a
history of drug problems- and has worked the streets as well].
I mean it was like I was talking
to old friends- all guards were down.
I talked to the girls- she asked
for a dollar or 2- I gave her a 5.
As we talked for about 5 minutes-
she said ‘could I have a hug’.
Sure hon- I hugged her.
People- especially in that type
of work- don’t get hugs from strangers- a hug that a friend would give.
I told David later- he asked ‘did
you make her pay you 10 for the hug’.
Yesterday I texted David [partner
in the halfway house]
I told him I was going to spend
some time in the area- if he wanted to hook up- talk business and stuff [we are
in the middle of possibly getting a new place for the halfway house].
He didn’t text back.
Why?
He called me the day before- I
was on the road to the Bishop meeting- I couldn’t take the call.
I texted him later- gave him the
appraisal on the property [he has no computer- another thing I told him he
needs to do- about a year ago].
So- David- he still has the
‘mentality’ of the days when he used- will not text- or answer the phone-
because he has told me he does this to get the people to come to him.
He does this with his boys at
times [Jesse and Travis].
So- I didn’t take it personal- I
still texted him- kept him up to date on my schedule.
But I’m busy- if you don’t text
me—I dont have time to play these types of games- I headed back to the Bluff
and figured he’ll call me when he needs to get together.
He called the next day when I was
at the mission.
I don’t play the game- so I took
the call and he still had some stuff to do [it would have been better the day
before!] but I went over anyway.
Now- I want to give you the feel
of how we work- how I have been unconventional in the ministry- my guys are all
ex street guys- David murdered his friend years ago.
In many ways- they are like the disciples
Jesus had- rough and tumble fisherman- hanging out around the fire- probably dropping
the ‘f- bomb’ every so often.
So- I go to the other side of town-
Jackie’s outside and she lets me in.
David is in his bedroom
[remember- ex- Meth head alcoholic- known in the bluff as a killer].
He’s on his knees by his bed-
praying.
Looked so sweet. I say ‘hey Boy-
I’m here’. [Davids 62]
He turns around- scared ‘F—k- you
scared the shit out of me- never walk up to someone behind their back’.
Now- this is normal- I even
kidded him- I mean it wasn’t a serious thing- but I did scare the guy.
My time with these guys- seeing
things that I don’t like [he’s not married to Jackie- but he tells me time and
again God sent her to him].
At first I did tell him ‘you need
to get married bro- you can’t just do the common law thing’
He’s been married about 3 or 4
times before- and the last ex [who lives in my neighborhood] won’t give him a
divorce- she won’t sign the papers- though she too has another ‘husband’.
So- I at least tell the guys in
these situations the best they can do.
I tell them ‘then- make sure it’s
the only one- if you think God gave her to you- and for all these reasons you can’t
do it legally- then don’t have any other ‘wives’ on the side’.
Now- I know all the scriptures on
this- that is on marriage.
And I would not give this advice
to the ‘normal’ person- but these guys are not normal.
And I try and do the best.
I was talking to a girl at the
mission- one of the girls that I feel does want to hear the stuff I’m teaching-
so I talk there at the mission.
She is a cute girl- so the other
guys are trying to sit next to her and stuff.
But I was talking about co-dependence.
How some people are too dependent
on others- especially in relationships.
Last year- when I left Texas- I
thought I might live back north- for good.
I did check out the rents and
stuff- they were high.
I was trying to hear God- I read
the gospels again- and noticed the words of Jesus- especially about moving on.
He did say ‘except a man leave his
father- wife- family- and follow me- he can’t be my disciple’.
Now- I know people can [and have]
misread these things.
But I felt there was a sense of
what I was going thru.
My wife knew I always wanted to
go to N.J. and do street ministry- I told her now was the time.
The kids are older- I’m retired-
the ‘s—t’ has hit the fan- what the hell- might as well give it a shot.
I told her ‘One thing God told me
was- if I go [and don’t come back]- I am not to hook up with anyone else’.
That is- I’m going to finish the
journey- single. [we were going thru lots of stuff at the time- and we did not
know how things would work out].
I’ll come back to Texas- see
everyone- but I’m not going to ‘find’ someone.
Now- these discussions were
honest- and my wife knew I always wanted to go back north.
While I was there- I told someone
else the same thing- that at this stage [at the time I thought I was not coming
back to Texas] that from now on- I’m single.
The point I was making- and
trying to share with some of the friends- is we often mistake [replace] the dependence
we should have in God- with people.
Paul the apostle was single- and
told the Corinthians that he would prefer them to do the same.
Then he made one of those comments
that gets him in hot water- he said ‘but- if you can’t do it- it’s better to marry-
then burn’.
Huh?
He meant ‘burn in lust’.
Ok- marriage s honorable- a God ordained
institution.
But being single is too and many
in the modern Evangelical church miss this- especially when we teach so much on
relationships in the church- we often leave a negative view of those called to
be single.
So- in David’s case- I bend the
rules- I see where he was- where he is now- and I try not to compromise- but I
try and do my best.
Plus- I owe him one- I did scare
the hell out of the big baby- when he was kneeling by his bed- in prayer.
NOTE- Christians have a history
of going to extremes- either falling into the proverbial ditch on the left or
right.
For instance- the bible speaks of
the church as a Body [of people].
We need one another to fulfill
Gods purpose- we are a corporate community of people.
Yet- many of the famous people in
the bible did ‘go it alone’.
John the Baptist- whom Jesus said
was the greatest prophet born [besides himself] was called ‘the voice of one
crying in the wildernes’.
The bible speaks about finding our identity in
God- not in people- spouses- girl/boyfriends- not even in ministry [many
Pastors operate out of a bad self-image- and seek to find identity in ‘church’
stuff].
In order for any
marriage/relationship to make it- both partners can’t see the other one as
their sense of purpose.
No- we first find our identity in
God- and if you are in a relationship- then you have common ground- God coming
first.
The media- soap operas- commercials-
even the songs I like [classic rock] often speak about the other person as the reason
for their existence.
Even some Christian teaching
holds the same view- which is wrong.
If any person sees the other one
as ‘the reason for their fulfillment’ in life- then it won’t work.
No other person can fulfill that role-
and when we in society fall for that- then it leads to bad relationships- or abusive
ones.
That’s a root that leads to
jealousy- which is the cause for many of the cases of domestic violence.
Even if a person’s calling in
life is not be single [though some are called to be single] yet those
relationships need to be grounded first in God- then you love your mate as a
result of your love for God.
Paul talks about marriage
‘Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church- and gave himself for
it’.
If you’re seeking to find
happiness- or fulfilment- in the other person- then you will be let down- in
time.
There is indeed a Romantic theme
in scripture- the Song of Solomon is the closest you get to an erotic book of
the bible [if you read it carefully].
Some think that King Solomon- who
penned it- was talking about his one true love [he had many wives and
concubines].
In the New Testament we read of
the relationship between Christ and the Church- also called the Bride and the
Bridegroom.
So- true romance and deep love
for your wife/husband is biblical- but it can only operate when we are grounded
in God.
SUNDAY-
Getting ready to go to church-
then to Alice [City here in Texas] to do some house shopping with my daughter
Becky.
My kids came over yesterday to work
on the real estate business we are getting into- looking into incorporating and
stuff.
I figured it was time to give a
heads up to my North Bergen crew- I told the boys I’d be coming back this year.
Now- let me tell a little story-
how God kind of has to work behind the scenes- and some times you don’t know what’s
going on- till after the fact.
Last year- I was on the streets
with these guys- and sure- they are living the rough life- like my Texas crew.
Over time- we became good
friends- even though they were a little hesitant at first.
So- as I hung out with the guys-
for 3 months- I did Blog and post pictures of the whole thing.
One of my buddies [like one in
Texas as well] did not like me taking their pictures.
But- I took them anyway- I had
to- to be able to tell the story- and Blog as well.
So- I did realize that they
probably would be pissed off if they realized what I was doing- but I did not
try and hide the thing- I told them what I was doing.
I also told them the web site and
all- at the start.
But- I usually hand out my
ministry card that has the site on it- and I would have given them to the boys-
but before I left Texas- I burned about 500 cards.
Why?
I went thru a stage of starting
over- I thought I was leaving everything behind- and starting new.
I had no plans on doing any ‘big’
ministry stuff anymore- and was going to finish the journey- doing what I love
most- reaching out to the street guys- and doing it where I grew up.
So- I didn’t have any cards- and
most of the guys never read the sight- because of this.
But- near the end of my 3 month
journey- some of the ‘normal’ guys – I call them the senior crowd- they too
hung out at White Castle- and they saw me with these street boys for the past 3
months.
I’m sure they thought I was one
of them [and in a way I was- but I was the only one not using].
So- one day the senior crew were
talking about the bible and stuff- and for the first time- I budded in- and
corrected some stuff they had wrong [the time of the writing of the New
Testament].
I think they were intrigued a
bit- thinking I was a user [drugs].
That’s when I started a little
‘group’ with these older guys.
One was an atheist- but I get
along with these guys.
He did the standard thing they
do- he was nice- but used some ‘big’ curse words and all- thinking that would rile
me up [heck- I use them myself every so often].
So- we had some good talks- to be
honest- I had read more of the books by atheists then he had.
The top 3 atheists in the last 10
years are Sam Harris- Christopher Hitchens [who died] and Richard Dawkins.
He was not even familiar with
them [showing me he was really not up to our debates- fine with me- I knew I
would 'win’ the argument- in a nice way].
I became buddies with these guys
too- as a matter of fact- one day when I was not around- the atheist told Rick
[the street crew] ‘hey- that guy knows his stuff’.
Now- at the end of my trip- I
told the senior crew ‘just Google Corpus Christi Outreach Ministries- and
you’ll find my site.’
I thought later- well- I’m sure
the street boys will eventually read the site- and I’ll just let the chips
fall.
I never hid the site from them- I
just didn’t have the cards- and those guys were not going to Google it- they are
on the streets for heaven’s sake!
So- after I got back to Texas-
they kept in touch- but the only guys who have my phone number- are the street crew.
So- when the senior crowd [who
were more interested in what was going on- they read the site- they would go
thru Rick because they knew he was in touch].
So anyway- I finally figured I’d
better call the North Bergen boys- give them a heads up on when I’m coming
back.
I texted them- Rick called back-
and my other buddy Nick.
Rick knew it was me- we had a
good talk- he tells me the boys are asking all the time when John’s coming
back. As a matter of fact he texted me back at 5 [when the senior crew get to
White Castle] and he asked if I was coming before the end of the year- I said
yes- I’m sure the senior crew wanted more info.
Now- Nick- who I knew would be
the most pissed about me posting all their stories- he just saw the text ‘hey
you boys still around’ I guess he didn’t know it was me.
So- I see the call come in- it
says Nick [I’m glad these guys keep the same phone numbers- in Texas they get
new numbers and I lose touch].
So- incoming call- NICK.
I get it- he says ‘whose this’-
‘John- from Texas- hey buddy- what’s up’.
‘OH JOHN’
The phone goes dead.
I figured he read the site.
A few minutes after he does call
back- but I was working on some stuff- and figured I’ll give him some time to
cool off.
But he does text me twice ‘John-
the phone cut off- I tried to call- you didn’t answer’.
I think he probably cooled off-
when he first realized I was posting the stuff [like I did tell them].
And I texted him- told him no
problem- I’ll get with him later.
Rick called back- told me how
they are all waiting for me [for real- I know it’s not a set-up- I have been around
the block- I can tell].
Rick says ‘yeah John- there are
no more ‘regrets’- the guys want to see you again’.
He meant ‘no more hard feelings’-
even though no one has said anything- I could pick up on what he meant.
Now- if I never burned the cards-
things might have not gone too well.
Because I’m sure they would have
gotten into it with me- not real bad- but we probably would have gotten into a
little argument- maybe a ‘small’ fight or something- but this has happened over
the years- and you do your best- make up later- stuff like that.
NOTE- When I was in New Jersey
last year- I didn’t pray for the guys- or really do any meetings- but became
friends [this year I’ll start the meetings].
But right before I left- I was
sitting with Rick and his wife Stacy- right at the entrance of Hudson County Park-
on the rocks.
We were saying our goodbyes and
all- Rick and Stacy both drink- and do other stuff.
They were crying about stuff and
all- I told them I have been clean for 9 months [at that time] and I told them
I was going to the NA meetings too. I asked them ‘let me pray for you guys’.
We sat there – I prayed with
them- talked about change.
Rick told me he was going to
start going to AA- they wanted to make a change.
I don’t know if he went or what-
but the other day he told me Stacy has been sober for 5 months [right at the
time I prayed with her and had this talk].
You make friends with people- you
love them thru the good and bad- and every now and then you see results.
The other week I was at the mission-
and I was sitting in my spot- I always wear those sunglasses you see in my
pics- I got them in New Jersey last year- and they are my only prescription
glasses.
So I wear them- even at night
[you know how it is- when I got the glasses- my first prescriptions in about 10
years- I picked the frames I liked- and these only came in sunglasses- so who
thinks ahead?]
So- as I get up at the mission- some
kid [25 year old?] is sitting right behind me- with a hat and shades on.
Staring at the back of my head.
I couldn’t care less- you know-
you do make enemies over time- I didn’t recognize him- but over the years- when
I was drinking- I didn’t even remember where I would park the truck [or how I
even got home- bad].
So- I thought maybe it was some
kid from that time- knowing where I was.
One day at the mission- from the crowd
I heard ‘f—k you John’.
I didn’t see who it was- but I
did say- ‘who said it!’
No one answered.
So- after a while the kid left.
Now- here’s the funny thing.
As I left the mission about a
half hour later- I had no meetings to do- and as I was leaving I thought ‘you know
Lord- let me do my Ayres walk today’.
Last year I walked all over the
city- and there’s a street all the way on the other side of town- so I drove to
a parking lot- got out- put on some classic rock with the cell phone- and off I
went.
Sure enough- as I’m walking- the
kid is coming the other way- he was on this street.
Now- he wasn’t following me- I was
'following’ him.
He must have thought ‘how the
hell did this guy know where to find me’?
I didn’t!
It was funny in a way.
I mean he just walked right past
me- but must have thought I’m some under cover guy with a tracking device-
heck- I just wanted to do my walk! [It was the first time in about 7 months
that I did this walk].
So- God has ways of working stuff
out- he knows what’s going on- even when we don’t
In 2nd Kings chapter 6
we read the story of Elisha- and how God used him to reveal the plans of the
king of Syria- ahead of time- it says ‘Therefore the heart of the king of Syria
was sore troubled for this thing [someone was spilling the beans on the king]
and he called his servants and said unto them ‘will ye not show me which of us
is for the king of Israel [he thought someone from his team was ratting him
out] and one of his servants said ‘none my lord, but Elisha the prophet that is
in Israel, tells the king of Israel the words that thou speakest in thy
bedchamber’ verses 11-12.
I have had other experiences like
the few I mentioned above- where I felt the Lord wanted me to do outreach in
another area- for months.
Then later found out that it was
‘good’ that I was not in a certain place for that time.
I always wondered if others
thought ‘how the hell did he know not to be here!’
I didn’t!
These things are actually funny
to me- because I realize- like the king of Syria- these people probably think
someone ratted them out [because I know all the guys/gals on the streets- and
yes- they have told me stuff before].
But when you do ministry like this- of course
you take chances- but if it’s really your purpose- God has your back.
NOTE- The story of Elisha and the
spy thing is found in 2nd Kings 6-7. The king of Syria is setting up
an ambush for the king of Israel. But every time he sets it up- the king of
Israel finds out- because the prophet Elisha knows everything the king ‘says in
his bed’. Prophetic gifts don’t just ‘predict’ the future- they can even know
what the enemy is thinking. Now- the chapter says this happened ‘not once- or
twice’ meaning it happened so many times that the authorities got paranoid-
they did think they had a snitch in the camp.
So- the king of Syria targets
Elisha- and sends his troops to surround the city- Dothan- and get the guy.
In the morning when Elisha’s
servant gets up- he sees the city surrounded by soldiers and chariots- the
servant panics.
Elisha is calm- he says ‘there
are more with us- then with them’. He then prays for God to open the eyes of
his servant- and in heaven- over the area where all this is playing out- there
is an angelic host of angels and chariots waiting for the word of Elisha- it
seems as if Elisha was now in charge [the stone that the builders rejected-
targeted- has now become the head of the corner- he is now calling the shots].
So- instead of telling the angels
and chariots to wipe out the army. He asks for God to blind them- that is for
them not to recognize him. He then goes down to the army [he is right in the
middle of it all] and tells them ‘hey boys- you got the wrong city- come- follow
me- I’ll show you where to go’.
He leads the entire Syrian army
right into the middle of Samaria- the home base of Israel.
They then realize they were set up-
by this lone prophet- and they are scared.
The king of Israel asks ‘Father
[he calls Elisha dad] should we kill them all now’?
Elisha says no- but FEED THEM.
Jesus- in the New Testament said when
your enemy is hungry feed him- in doing this you ‘heap coals of fire on his
head’.
So- the king makes a huge feast
for the enemy- and sends them on their way packing.
After a while they come back
[see- they had a chance to leave them alone- but like Pharaoh- they had to
pursue one last time].
They do it again- surround the
city and ‘lay it to siege’- back in those days the cities had walls for protection-
they would open the gates for trade and supplies- but if an enemy surrounds
you- they just let the city go to ruin over time- because no supplies get in.
Like what we do today- in Iran we have had economic sanctions going for a long
time- hoping to crumble the ruling Mullahs.
So- the king of Israel is mad- he
had the chance to wipe them out- but Elisha said let them go.
The king is walking thru town one
day and a woman from the wall yells ‘king- king- help me’.
He says ‘what could I do- we are
all going to hell in a hand basket’ [my paraphrase].
The woman says ‘I had a deal with
this other lady- we agreed that if we cooked my son one day- that the next day
we would cook hers’.
They were starving.
So she tells the king they ate
hers- but now the other lady hid her son.
The king hears this- he rents his
clothes [a sign of mourning] and says ‘so be it to me if I don’t chop the head
of Elisha off this day’.
Elisha not only has to watch out
for the enemy- now he has the actual authorities pissed off too.
So the king sends a messenger to
take the message to Elisha.
Elisha is sitting with some
elders in his house- and before the messenger gets there- he says ‘look- this
son of a murderer is now coming to kill me’.
Sure enough the messenger arrives
and they stop him at the door.
Now- Elisha gives a prophetic
word- he says ‘by this time tomorrow there will be so much food- it will be
sold for practically nothing’.
How?
One of the other guys says ‘even
if God opened the windows of heaven- this could not happen so fast’.
Elisha tells the guy ‘you will
see it with your eyes- but never taste a bite’- Elisha pronounced a prophetic
judgment on the guy.
The next day- in 2nd
Kings chapter 7 we find the story- there are 4 Lepers sitting at the gate- they
say ‘why sit we here till we die- if we go back into the city- we will starve-
if we sit here we will die- what the hell- let’s just go to the Syrians- what else
could happen- if they kill us- they kill us’.
You will never believe what
happened next!
Now- for the rest of the story-
go read the chapter- 2nd Kings 7 [John- are you trying to trick us
to read the bible? Yes].
NOTE- I want to do something here
that I normally would not.
If the CCPD are still reading
these posts- let me give you guys a hand- for real.
This past week I talked to both
Dirk and Tennessee [Dirk stabbed him last week].
When Dirk first told me what he
told you guys- I did not believe the story- like you.
When I talked to Tennessee- he
did indeed tell me he was on top of Dirk beating the shit out of him when it
happened.
I did not think Tennessee had it
in him to be honest- Dirks a big boy.
But-that’s what he says.
He didn’t say if he ‘fell on the
knife’ [I frankly don’t believe that he did].
But it does look like Dirk was justified-
a self-defense thing seems pretty plausible.
I know the state can pick up the
charges- but from what I heard- it seems like it was self-defense.
I told Dirk that I talked with Tennessee-
and that he is not talking to the cops- but told me he was getting the best of
him when it happened- Dirk said yeah- like I told you.
So- I normally wouldn’t post
stuff like this- I know most of the witnesses are not talking- so- if this
helps- good.
TUESDAY- Got up at 3- normal for
me- I did about an hour of prayer/meditation-
then about an hour of listening to some classic rock on my phone [Hootie and
the Blowfish- few others].
About 5 my wife comes looking for
me- she just heard on the news that they found a body under the bridge at 4 am-
the spot where I walk- sometimes- at 4 am.
She said ‘I wanted to see if it
was you’.
Not yet- I’m on a roll right now-
let’s see how long it lasts?
Ok- just a note. Someone told me
once ‘John- you are trying to get shot’.
Am I?
Honestly- no- at least I don’t
think so.
Many years ago- in the early days
of ministry- I had 2 occasions where it came very close.
At that time- I still remember
them- I had a choice- run- fight- or do nothing and make a decision now that if
you want to do this type of ministry- you will have to take risks.
I didn’t run- or fight- I stuck
it out.
Both of these guys are now dead-
long ago.
But since that time- to be
honest- I never think about it.
Ok- yesterday at the mission John
[new guy] told me ‘they arrested Don [aka Metal head] at the park Saturday’.
Dave- a guy who feeds the street
people- feeds them on Saturday- right by the police station.
Now- Don has come to the mission
stumbling drunk- he gets drunk early- and is wasted.
So- John told me he was there in
the street- falling down drunk.
He said the cops went out of their
way to be nice- they weren’t even going to arrest him- they offered to take him
to the ‘drunk tank’ [sit in jail till you sober up].
But Don got rowdy- and swung at
them.
STUPID.
Of course they arrested him then.
I wanted to say I’m sure the
chief has tried to improve the situation that I have been writing on- and from
all accounts- I think they are trying.
It was described to me that the
cops went out of their way to be nice- and do right.
They did right.
Yesterday I told a few of the
street crew that if they wanted to kick back at the house- watch a movie- come
on over [watched Apocalypse now- Redux]
I gave one a ride- but he wanted
to stop down the block real fast.
I told him ‘as long as you don’t
pick anything up’ [Meth].
He said no.
Then I said ‘or drop anything
off’.
He looked at me- called the other
guy [I know them all].
And said ‘John wont drive me
there- come over here’ [the mission].
They did their stuff- I said hi
to the crew- and then took my buddy to the house.
Now- I said that to say this.
My policy has always been ‘no
drugs in the car- or at my house’.
But I know these guys are on the
streets- and if they have stuff- they carry it.
But this year I’m making sure
they follow the rule- and they know it.
The street ministries who feed
the guys- they need to tell them ‘if you show up drunk – falling down drunk-
you can’t eat’.
Why?
If we want the cops to do right-
and you have guys showing up- about 100 yards from the P.D. - falling down
drunk- that’s illegal.
Then- if they go out of their way
to do the right thing- and you swing at them- that makes it harder for them to
do the right thing the next time.
Let me tell a story.
About 20 years ago- at the Fire
House- we got a call- some gang kid got into trouble.
We also did the ambulance- went
to shootings at times and stuff like that.
So- that day I went on the ambulance
with another EMT and responded to the call- the cops were there.
I went to check the kid- and he swung
at me.
Normally the cops jump on him right
there.
But they didn’t have time- I lost
it- I grabbed the kid- drug him out of the house- and threw him in the back
seat of the cop car.
Got back to the station- went
upstairs to watch the fights [I liked boxing] and the guys called up stairs
‘Hey John P.D. called [P.D. - Police Dept.].
They said ‘Send that guy on all
the runs’.
So- even I have done this stuff.
This stuff works both ways- we
can’t have the homeless population walking around drunk- falling down drunk.
If the ministries that are trying
to help them let this go on- then they are at fault.
Set some guidelines- and abide by
them.
If we want the P.D. to do right-
then we have to do right as well.
WEDNESDAY
Had a good meeting in Bishop
yesterday- talked about the story I mentioned above- 2nd Kings 6-7.
I guess I’ll finish it.
We left off when the 4 lepers
decided to go for broke- ‘if we sit here- we die- if we go back into the city
we die- what the hell- lets go to the Syrians- if they kill us- we shall but
die’.
I like these boys- they gave it a
shot- took some risks- but in the end it turned out well.
They go to the Syrian camp- and
it’s empty- the Syrian army fled the night before- and left all their goods-
for the taking.
God caused them to hear the noise
of the chariots- the heavenly host that Elisha saw in chapter 6.
It seems as if Elisha had power
over this angelic army- he made them blind the Syrians in chapter 6.
Then he made their sound heard by
the Syrians.
So- the 4 lepers begin hoarding
all the goods for themselves- and one of them says ‘we do not good- this day we
have an opportunity like no other- all this stuff- and we are keeping it for
ourselves’.
So- they decide to go back to the
city of Samaria and tell their king what happened.
At first he is skeptical-
remember- the city was under siege for months.
When we feel like the world is
closing in around us- we get paranoid- we don’t see life for what it is- our
view becomes jaded.
So- the king decides to send a
couple of chariots and some men to see if it’s true- he thought it was a trap.
The men come back and tell him
‘yeah- we checked it out- and the Syrians fled- they even dropped all their
goods right on the road’.
So the king sends his people to
get all the stuff- it was a mad rush- like a Black Friday shopping day at Wal
Mart- you know- we have even had people die at the doors- getting trampled for big
screen TV’s and stuff.
Now- remember the prophecy Elisha
gave to the guy who said ‘how can God turn this around- even if the windows of
heaven were opened- he couldn’t turn it around so fast’.
Elisha said ‘you will see it with
your eyes- but not partake’.
That guy was put in charge of the
city gate- and when the people rushed back with the stuff- he was trampled in
the gate and killed.
He saw the goods- like Elisha
said- but never partook.
Ok- lets wrap up this week- lots
of stuff going on.
Yesterday before I went to
Bishop- I talked with my buddies at the mission.
Dirk sat outside next to me- I listened
for a while- talked about life- and it reminded me of the many years when we
had these talks.
I told him I was telling one of
the girls at the mission how in life- we need to come to a place where we are
accepted- where we know that God accepts us- we are ok- nothing wrong with us.
Now- even though we struggle- the
point I was making is God makes us well- and we don’t live for the approval of
men.
Many of us struggle with
insecurity- and in God we find our rest.
Dirk and I talked for a while-
just like the old days.
Even though there’s still a
chance that he might get arrested for the stabbing- the root need- the basic
thing- has not changed.
We spoke about the same things we
have discussed over the years- and sometimes the best thing I could do for my
friends is just listen- lots of people simply need someone to hear them.
I’ll be heading to Alice soon- to
look at a house with my daughter Becky- Jeremy- the firefighter from Dallas who
owns the property where we do the halfway house- he texted me last night- got
back in town- wants to check out my house- I’m selling it soon- I told him if
he wants he can take a look at it before I list it.
So- that’s it for this week- talk
to you later.
Note- Do me a favor, those who
read/like the posts- re-post them on other sites as well as the site you read
them on. Thanks- John. Don’t forget to scroll down on the timeline [FaceBookl]
- I have posted lots.